Well, I haven't posted anything since January, when I was in NY, visiting Elliot. Guess where I am now ?! NY, visiting Elliot. I flew in last Tuesday (March 23), and will fly back home this upcoming Tuesday (March 29).
So far, it's been an absolutely wonderful visit. I have walked on the Beach fore several days now. Not short little walks, but 2 hour walks. I walk the 2 mile boardwalk, then walk back by walking right against the shore. I feel like I could walk forever when walking right beside the waves. I have always found the sounds of the waves lapping against the shore, so relaxing. I have found some really interesting shells....It's still pretty cool here, so there are not many people on the beach picking up seashells. So when walking, I have found some really interesting ones. One of the days I walked, the temperature was a little colder than I was expecting, and there was no one on the beach but me. I was in my own little world. It was like heaven on earth. I just got lost in watching and hearing the waves crash on the shore....looking for shells. Time was no longer an enemy. It just didn't exist.
Elliot has had to work during the days, which has afforded me the opportunity to get in exercise, catch up on my reading, do some grocery shopping and cooking.
On Saturday, we took the dogs and walked the Nautical Mile, here in Freeport. It was quite chilly out. We stopped in at a Fresh Seafood Market on the docks and bought fresh red snapper and squid. It was a wonderful meal that evening. Fresh Fish is truly the best.
On Sunday, we drove toward the city to walk the dogs in Central Park, but as we got closer to the city the rain started falling. Therefore, we laid those plans to rest and drove to Queens to the Asian Market. Elliot's BF Nong shops there all the time. I must say, It's a true field trip when I go to the Asian Market. Fresh Vegetables are everywhere...and Fresh Fish....It's unbelievable the food that is out there that I have never tried. I'm so sheltered...LOL...Anyway...all for now
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Jan 2010 - Bad Jeff ! I haven't Posted since OCT !
Happy All Saints' Day....Happy Thanksgiving....Merry Christmas.....Happy New Year !
All of these holidays have occurred since my last post ! Where did the time go ?! My last post was right after I had returned from NY, visiting Elliot and the Grand Dogs. And guess where I am now? Yep...NY....visiting again ! I guess I just don't have much time to blog between my vacations. I get into the routine of life in NC...work...caring for the kids and dogs...and there just isn't enough of me time. However, that's totally OK...I love my time in life with my kids !
So....what's been going on since my last post? Let me think....
Well...while in NY in October, my Leader at work contacted me and advised me that a 2nd shift schedule had come available and wanted to know if I was still interested in moving from 3rd shift to 2nd. For most...it would be an unattractive schedule (working Friday - Monday and off Tues - Thurs), but with Andrew still living at home and in high school and the pay differential for working double day weekends, I decided to go for it. I had been on 3rd shift for over 8 years now. I had finally come to the conclusion that 3rd shift was no longer healthy for me. I have poor eating and exercise habits..and then my sleep schedule is another story. Therefore, I took the opportunity. However, due to staffing issues, it took 2 months for my 2nd shift schedule to take effect. I have only worked 3 days on 2nd and then I went out on vacation...lol...
After getting back from NY in October, I made the decision to stop attending church for a while. It had nothing to do with College Park Church....It's a wonderful church. However, I'm not a believer in being a "Sunday Morning Pew Warmer". I believe being apart of a church is where true Spiritual Growth occurs. Whether on 3rd shift or 2nd shift, I am just unable to be apart of the life of the church. I was frequently invited by folks to come to dinner, go to gatherings, etc...but 95% of the time, I had to decline due to my work schedule. It was so frustrating. Therefore, I have chosen not to attend. I have emailed a few friends there and emailed the pastor. In due time, my schedule will become more "normal" and I can be active in church.
Funny thing...I can't remember much in November until close to Thanksgiving. I have made an attempt to reconcile with a cousin of mine with whom I have been very close until my "coming out" in 2005. Since, this cousin has had nothing to do with me. I contacted this cousin and had a pretty direct conversation. Initially, it seems things are better. I went to this cousin's birthday dinner in November. Close to Christmas I had she, her husband and her mother (my aunt), along with the kids and my parents over for a Christmas Dinner. I am attempting to bring healing between the 2 of us. We may just have to agree to disagree on some life issues. Additionally, we are getting older and I don't want to live life without her. However, I shouldn't have to conform to her thinking for us to be able to love one another and spend time together. Only time will tell.
The latter parts of November and December, I had several small dinner parties with my parents, and some aunts and uncles. My family is getting older and I want to take some opportunities to spend time with them. My mom has 5 siblings still alive. Her oldest brother (my uncle who lives next door to me) is now 85....my mom's oldest sister, Aunt Dot is 84. Uncle Harvey gets around pretty well, but is obviously slowing down. He now walks with a cane most of the time. Aunt Dot we moved into an Assisted Living Home in 2009. Her Parkinson's has worstened and her health has had a marked decline since 2008. Another one of my mom's older Sisters, Elsie, is doing well...However, she has quite a bit of hip and back pain. All of these were apart of the dinners I had. I find that I need to take the opportunities to spend time with the ones I love, before the opportunity is no longer there.
Christmas was nice and quiet. Mom, Dad, Uncle Harvey, Aunt Margaret were over for Christmas Eve Dinner with the kids and I. Beef Burgundy...Broccoli with Cheese and a Coconut Cake was the menu. On Christmas Day, Aunt Dot came over with Mom and Dad. The kids slept in a bit. We had our traditional Christmas Lunch...Afterwards, we opened presents. It was very relaxing.
Elliot , Nong and the 6 Grand Dogs came home on Wed, Dec 30....They were supposed to have arrived on Tueday night the 29th, but his job prevented him from leaving any earlier. It was great to have "MY Family" all together. It was cold and rainy the whole visit. New Year's Eve was laid back....We watched the ole ball drop at Times Square and drank Champagne.
I rode back with Elliot, Nong and the dogs on Saturday, Jan 2. It was freezing cold from NC to NY. When we arrived, Elliot's boiler had broken and there was no heat or hot water...It was 34 degrees in the house. I was ready to head for the nearest hotel ! However, he plugged in some electric heaters and it finally warmed up enough we could stay in the house. I had the bright idea of hanging a blanket between the opening of the dining room and Den and it actually got warm in the Den. YAY ! Sunday was frigid...and it snowed off and on most of the day. The "Boiler Guy" came out and we finally got hot water...but no heat ....bigger issues....but no worries...the electric heaters work fine now.
On Mon & Tuesday, I have hung out around the house...relaxing and catching up on movies....blogging (as you can tell ) and emailing old friends. It's Wednesday and I plan on finish up this blog ! and do some napping and reading.
Any who...More later.
All of these holidays have occurred since my last post ! Where did the time go ?! My last post was right after I had returned from NY, visiting Elliot and the Grand Dogs. And guess where I am now? Yep...NY....visiting again ! I guess I just don't have much time to blog between my vacations. I get into the routine of life in NC...work...caring for the kids and dogs...and there just isn't enough of me time. However, that's totally OK...I love my time in life with my kids !
So....what's been going on since my last post? Let me think....
Well...while in NY in October, my Leader at work contacted me and advised me that a 2nd shift schedule had come available and wanted to know if I was still interested in moving from 3rd shift to 2nd. For most...it would be an unattractive schedule (working Friday - Monday and off Tues - Thurs), but with Andrew still living at home and in high school and the pay differential for working double day weekends, I decided to go for it. I had been on 3rd shift for over 8 years now. I had finally come to the conclusion that 3rd shift was no longer healthy for me. I have poor eating and exercise habits..and then my sleep schedule is another story. Therefore, I took the opportunity. However, due to staffing issues, it took 2 months for my 2nd shift schedule to take effect. I have only worked 3 days on 2nd and then I went out on vacation...lol...
After getting back from NY in October, I made the decision to stop attending church for a while. It had nothing to do with College Park Church....It's a wonderful church. However, I'm not a believer in being a "Sunday Morning Pew Warmer". I believe being apart of a church is where true Spiritual Growth occurs. Whether on 3rd shift or 2nd shift, I am just unable to be apart of the life of the church. I was frequently invited by folks to come to dinner, go to gatherings, etc...but 95% of the time, I had to decline due to my work schedule. It was so frustrating. Therefore, I have chosen not to attend. I have emailed a few friends there and emailed the pastor. In due time, my schedule will become more "normal" and I can be active in church.
Funny thing...I can't remember much in November until close to Thanksgiving. I have made an attempt to reconcile with a cousin of mine with whom I have been very close until my "coming out" in 2005. Since, this cousin has had nothing to do with me. I contacted this cousin and had a pretty direct conversation. Initially, it seems things are better. I went to this cousin's birthday dinner in November. Close to Christmas I had she, her husband and her mother (my aunt), along with the kids and my parents over for a Christmas Dinner. I am attempting to bring healing between the 2 of us. We may just have to agree to disagree on some life issues. Additionally, we are getting older and I don't want to live life without her. However, I shouldn't have to conform to her thinking for us to be able to love one another and spend time together. Only time will tell.
The latter parts of November and December, I had several small dinner parties with my parents, and some aunts and uncles. My family is getting older and I want to take some opportunities to spend time with them. My mom has 5 siblings still alive. Her oldest brother (my uncle who lives next door to me) is now 85....my mom's oldest sister, Aunt Dot is 84. Uncle Harvey gets around pretty well, but is obviously slowing down. He now walks with a cane most of the time. Aunt Dot we moved into an Assisted Living Home in 2009. Her Parkinson's has worstened and her health has had a marked decline since 2008. Another one of my mom's older Sisters, Elsie, is doing well...However, she has quite a bit of hip and back pain. All of these were apart of the dinners I had. I find that I need to take the opportunities to spend time with the ones I love, before the opportunity is no longer there.
Christmas was nice and quiet. Mom, Dad, Uncle Harvey, Aunt Margaret were over for Christmas Eve Dinner with the kids and I. Beef Burgundy...Broccoli with Cheese and a Coconut Cake was the menu. On Christmas Day, Aunt Dot came over with Mom and Dad. The kids slept in a bit. We had our traditional Christmas Lunch...Afterwards, we opened presents. It was very relaxing.
Elliot , Nong and the 6 Grand Dogs came home on Wed, Dec 30....They were supposed to have arrived on Tueday night the 29th, but his job prevented him from leaving any earlier. It was great to have "MY Family" all together. It was cold and rainy the whole visit. New Year's Eve was laid back....We watched the ole ball drop at Times Square and drank Champagne.
I rode back with Elliot, Nong and the dogs on Saturday, Jan 2. It was freezing cold from NC to NY. When we arrived, Elliot's boiler had broken and there was no heat or hot water...It was 34 degrees in the house. I was ready to head for the nearest hotel ! However, he plugged in some electric heaters and it finally warmed up enough we could stay in the house. I had the bright idea of hanging a blanket between the opening of the dining room and Den and it actually got warm in the Den. YAY ! Sunday was frigid...and it snowed off and on most of the day. The "Boiler Guy" came out and we finally got hot water...but no heat ....bigger issues....but no worries...the electric heaters work fine now.
On Mon & Tuesday, I have hung out around the house...relaxing and catching up on movies....blogging (as you can tell ) and emailing old friends. It's Wednesday and I plan on finish up this blog ! and do some napping and reading.
Any who...More later.
Monday, October 26, 2009
NY - Feeling More Like Home
Over the last couple of years, visiting Elliot, NY is feeling more and more like home. Especially now, since he owns his own home and I am now returning to the same house time and time again.
On this particular trip, I arrived in early afternoon on Wednesday, Oct 14. Elliot was at work and I felt very comfortable taking the AirTrain from JFK over to Jamaica Station; then taking the Long Island RR over to Freeport; then grabbing a cab to the house.
Nong was at home and after settling in for a few minutes, he and I set off walking into Freeport. We got some pizza and came back home. Later in the afternoon, the rain began and basically didn't stop till Sunday. We ate Cozymel's in Westbury. A very good Mexican Restaurant.
On Thursday, Nong went to the city for the day, and I went with Elliot to take a couple of dogs to the vet and then onto his office. While he worked, I read. We had a late lunch, then I went back to the office to read more.
On Friday, I stayed home with Nong. We shopped at Costco and Target. I cooked dinner. I made Elliot's favorites; chicken pie, mac n chesse and Squash Casserole. He loved it. We hung out and watched movies.
On Saturday, we took Dumbledore, Penny and Mugsy for a walk between rain showers. While walking, Jessica calls to tell me that she totalled her car, trying to avoid a deer. UGH! something else to worry about...getting her a car. I must admit...I didn't handle that phone call very well.
Sunday, we sleep late, moved the living room into the dining room and moved the grand piano from the dining room into the living room. It looks great. The Living Room now has more of a DEN feeling...very cozy. In the afternoon later, we went over to visit Amy and Victor in East Rockaway. I was thrilled to know that Amy's mom, Sue, was visiting from Cleveland. I don't care if they are Linda's family, I still like them. Elliot and I took Pizza over and hung there for a couple of hours. After we got home, we hung out with Nong and watched movies.
On Monday, Elliot and Nong went to work, leaving me home for the day. I putzed around in the morning and in the afternoon, walked into the village for a bit. In the evening, Elliot and I ate at a new restaurant in the village. It was good, but overpriced.
On Tuesday, I went to work with Elliot while his VP and he make instructional videos for their customers. I helped them with the videos. It was fun. We got home pretty late. Thank goodness Nong had made dinner.
On Wednesday, Elliot and I went into the city for the day. He had a trade show to go too. I went along for a while and then left and did my own thing. Later in the day, Elliot caught up with me and we went to the MET (Metropolitan Museum of Art). Hands down, it was the best museum I have ever been too. We stayed for a couple of hours, but needed a whole day. We got home fairly early and went to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory.
All of my days were filled playing with the Poms. I love them so much...they are so cute and so well behaved.
I did pretty well coming home on Thursday. No tears....However, after I got home, I got really sad for a bit. Not only did I miss Elliot, Nong and the pups, but I missed NY. I really like it there...It feels like home.....a place I should be.....Sounds crazy....who knows what the future holds
On this particular trip, I arrived in early afternoon on Wednesday, Oct 14. Elliot was at work and I felt very comfortable taking the AirTrain from JFK over to Jamaica Station; then taking the Long Island RR over to Freeport; then grabbing a cab to the house.
Nong was at home and after settling in for a few minutes, he and I set off walking into Freeport. We got some pizza and came back home. Later in the afternoon, the rain began and basically didn't stop till Sunday. We ate Cozymel's in Westbury. A very good Mexican Restaurant.
On Thursday, Nong went to the city for the day, and I went with Elliot to take a couple of dogs to the vet and then onto his office. While he worked, I read. We had a late lunch, then I went back to the office to read more.
On Friday, I stayed home with Nong. We shopped at Costco and Target. I cooked dinner. I made Elliot's favorites; chicken pie, mac n chesse and Squash Casserole. He loved it. We hung out and watched movies.
On Saturday, we took Dumbledore, Penny and Mugsy for a walk between rain showers. While walking, Jessica calls to tell me that she totalled her car, trying to avoid a deer. UGH! something else to worry about...getting her a car. I must admit...I didn't handle that phone call very well.
Sunday, we sleep late, moved the living room into the dining room and moved the grand piano from the dining room into the living room. It looks great. The Living Room now has more of a DEN feeling...very cozy. In the afternoon later, we went over to visit Amy and Victor in East Rockaway. I was thrilled to know that Amy's mom, Sue, was visiting from Cleveland. I don't care if they are Linda's family, I still like them. Elliot and I took Pizza over and hung there for a couple of hours. After we got home, we hung out with Nong and watched movies.
On Monday, Elliot and Nong went to work, leaving me home for the day. I putzed around in the morning and in the afternoon, walked into the village for a bit. In the evening, Elliot and I ate at a new restaurant in the village. It was good, but overpriced.
On Tuesday, I went to work with Elliot while his VP and he make instructional videos for their customers. I helped them with the videos. It was fun. We got home pretty late. Thank goodness Nong had made dinner.
On Wednesday, Elliot and I went into the city for the day. He had a trade show to go too. I went along for a while and then left and did my own thing. Later in the day, Elliot caught up with me and we went to the MET (Metropolitan Museum of Art). Hands down, it was the best museum I have ever been too. We stayed for a couple of hours, but needed a whole day. We got home fairly early and went to dinner at the Cheesecake Factory.
All of my days were filled playing with the Poms. I love them so much...they are so cute and so well behaved.
I did pretty well coming home on Thursday. No tears....However, after I got home, I got really sad for a bit. Not only did I miss Elliot, Nong and the pups, but I missed NY. I really like it there...It feels like home.....a place I should be.....Sounds crazy....who knows what the future holds
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Update on Mugsy
Mugsy came home on Tuesday night. He is heavily medicated for pain and is on antibiotics. Elliot says he is quite out of it. Bless his little heart ! Hold On Mugsy !! Granddad is on his way !! I'll be there by 2 this afternoon !! And you will feel much better.
My Poor Little Grand Dog - Mugsy !
Elliot called last evening, in a panic ! He was holding Mugsy and I could hear my little pup crying in the background. Elliot says that he was just freaking out...He thinks it has something to do with the Bio - Spot that Nong put on him a couple of days prior. Elliot had already taken him to his vet and they had not very much for him and after getting back home, Mugsy had gotton worse. Elliot was in a panic.
I looked up online the side effects of Bio Spot reactions....After realizing many dogs who had allergic responses, died, I called a 24 hour Emergency Vet in his area and got an appt.
Elliot got him there and they put him on IVs and a heavy tranquilizer. Elliot had to leave him for the night and we can't get any information until later today !! UGH ! Hang in their Mugsy ! We love you !
I looked up online the side effects of Bio Spot reactions....After realizing many dogs who had allergic responses, died, I called a 24 hour Emergency Vet in his area and got an appt.
Elliot got him there and they put him on IVs and a heavy tranquilizer. Elliot had to leave him for the night and we can't get any information until later today !! UGH ! Hang in their Mugsy ! We love you !
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Faith
Over the last few years...I've been through alot...and my faith in God has taken a beating. Hmm...Not sure if my faith in God has taken as much of a beating as my faith in "God's People".
I'm not attempting to sound as if I'm a little angel or that I have done everything perfectly leading up to my separation and divorce. However, "The Church" / "God's People" were less than loving during it all.
The day that I moved out from my ex wife....she had attempted a "sneak attack" and had invited some people over for an "intervention". She laid out her case against me....I had nothing to say. I could have attacked her in front of these so called friends...I had solid evidence of her failures in the marriage...but what good would that have done? In my mind the marriage was already dead....I already had an apartment...It was just a matter of timing. So, I just moved out.
I was judged by people who considered me their best friend , as well as, the church I attended; with people who barely knew me. What was the crime ? Owning up to the truth ! Owning up to the fact, that this marriage had been dead for years and that we were only together for the children ? I will own and take responsibility for the way I ended up moving out...I should have sat the ex wife down and told her 2 months earlier of my intent on ending the marriage. However, I was a coward. I kept dragging out the inevitable. I should have been more of a man and just ended it instead of dragging it out.
However, the "Church / God's People" were silent to me except for a couple of very cold letters telling me how horrible I was....the disappointment I was....I NEVER got a letter or phone call asking me how I was...or are you ok ?
The reaction of "The Church" sent me into a downward spiral on my already faltering faith. As a conservative christian, I was struggling with being Gay and aligning myself to the Bible. I remained out of church for almost 4 years and my relationship with God damaged to the point of almost unbelief.
In 2008, I began attending a Progressive Church which accepts both straight and gay, equally. I am making the right steps...but far from where I would hope to be by now. I, truly, believe in a personal relationship with Jesus. A relationship that is about love, acceptance, worship, obedience. A relationship that causes me to be more like him...a more loving person.
God...Help me put some of this past behind me....Help me trust you....Help me believe that you love me for who I am...because you created me in your image....And you don't make mistakes.
I'm not attempting to sound as if I'm a little angel or that I have done everything perfectly leading up to my separation and divorce. However, "The Church" / "God's People" were less than loving during it all.
The day that I moved out from my ex wife....she had attempted a "sneak attack" and had invited some people over for an "intervention". She laid out her case against me....I had nothing to say. I could have attacked her in front of these so called friends...I had solid evidence of her failures in the marriage...but what good would that have done? In my mind the marriage was already dead....I already had an apartment...It was just a matter of timing. So, I just moved out.
I was judged by people who considered me their best friend , as well as, the church I attended; with people who barely knew me. What was the crime ? Owning up to the truth ! Owning up to the fact, that this marriage had been dead for years and that we were only together for the children ? I will own and take responsibility for the way I ended up moving out...I should have sat the ex wife down and told her 2 months earlier of my intent on ending the marriage. However, I was a coward. I kept dragging out the inevitable. I should have been more of a man and just ended it instead of dragging it out.
However, the "Church / God's People" were silent to me except for a couple of very cold letters telling me how horrible I was....the disappointment I was....I NEVER got a letter or phone call asking me how I was...or are you ok ?
The reaction of "The Church" sent me into a downward spiral on my already faltering faith. As a conservative christian, I was struggling with being Gay and aligning myself to the Bible. I remained out of church for almost 4 years and my relationship with God damaged to the point of almost unbelief.
In 2008, I began attending a Progressive Church which accepts both straight and gay, equally. I am making the right steps...but far from where I would hope to be by now. I, truly, believe in a personal relationship with Jesus. A relationship that is about love, acceptance, worship, obedience. A relationship that causes me to be more like him...a more loving person.
God...Help me put some of this past behind me....Help me trust you....Help me believe that you love me for who I am...because you created me in your image....And you don't make mistakes.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Leaving for NYC on Wednesay, Oct 14
YAY ! I'm excited to be visiting my oldest boy this week....I'm heading to NY on Wednesday Morning. However, alot has to take place before I leave....Grocery Store...Bank...3 more nights at American Express...2 more short shifts at Pier One.....packing....UGH ! I think Wednesday may be a blur ! I may be just exhausted.
I checked the weather for NY....Looks like the days will be low 60's or high 50's...nights in the 40's...but sad to say....seems like a lot of rain while i'm there....
I'm excited to see the granddogs !! I miss that ole Mugsy and Bella....Dumbledore, Orange Juice, and Penny ...
I don't really have a clue what we'll be doing while I'm there...I'm taking a couple of books...my laptop from work (only if I get totally bored)...
I'm hoping I'll get to hang out at the beach some...taking walks....I always get rejuvenated when at the seaside. I'm sure we'll go into the city a few times...as well.
I'm just happy to be there, visiting my son !
I checked the weather for NY....Looks like the days will be low 60's or high 50's...nights in the 40's...but sad to say....seems like a lot of rain while i'm there....
I'm excited to see the granddogs !! I miss that ole Mugsy and Bella....Dumbledore, Orange Juice, and Penny ...
I don't really have a clue what we'll be doing while I'm there...I'm taking a couple of books...my laptop from work (only if I get totally bored)...
I'm hoping I'll get to hang out at the beach some...taking walks....I always get rejuvenated when at the seaside. I'm sure we'll go into the city a few times...as well.
I'm just happy to be there, visiting my son !
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